Tour 1.26-1.28.06 (police chase, family reunion smell, sarah hits the roof)

This will be short because I am way behind on booking for a spring break tour (I’m still not sure why I’m touring Indiana and Illinois on Spring break…but that’s another blog for another day.)

Anyway, last Thursday was Christopher Pizza in Nashville. I had been practicing a little the previous few days, a rare thing as busy as I have recently become, and so I was feeling pretty good about the show. The turnout was bigger than I anticipated, and even though we were packed in like (insert funny and intelligent metaphor here), it was a great time.

So I guess it’s about time to tell you that I have undertaken the task of documenting my journey as an independent artist with a video camera (the old kind that uses analog tapes and has a viewfinder protruding from the back…vintage). I’m afraid to know what it will turn out like, but I began my day Friday with the camera running while I was driving to pick up Sarah (www.sarahpeacockmusic.com) and leave for Auburn. It sure it will end up looking like a police chase…

After a 5-hour drive to Opelika (just next to Auburn), we set up at 8th and Rail. Now for those who have never been there, it is quite possibly the coolest bar I have ever entered. I’m not sure how old the building is, but it is old. (Though not as old as the 90-year-old birthday party that was happening during load in…no joke. We got some odd looks from a few of them. I told Sarah it smelled like a family reunion…she threw up…not really though.) Anyway, they had old wood panels, hardwood floors, an alley in the back that must have been shipped in from San Francisco….shoot, they even had vintage toilets…I think. It was like Cheers, but cooler.

After the show I let Sarah pack up the gear because I had a couple of fans ask for one more song. What can I say…I’ll do anything to please a listener…and avoid load-out…sorry Sarah...

It was after 1:00 AM when we got on the road and headed to my parent’s house in B-ham. We were both sleepy. Sarah was a little concerned about me staying awake, but after while I put in the ear-buds, cranked up an audiobook (Leo Tolstoy, War and Peace), and told her to go to sleep. She did, and the best part of the evening was the huge pothole we hit getting onto I-459 from I-65. It was about 4:00 AM and Sarah jumped to the ceiling, certain that we were off the road and about to die. I laughed…then went back to sleep myself…

After we arrived and got a good morning’s sleep, I spent time visiting family and getting ready for another show. That night we were at the Cambridge Coffee in the Villages (off of 280 in B-ham). It was our first time there. The sound in the little corner where we were set up was terrible, but the crowd was great. (Kudos to my sis for bringing the John Carroll crowd.)

Now I’m not one to try things on the fly, but I got this crazy idea to record the audience clapping as part of my loop on “Before There Was Time.” It hit me during the first chorus and so I worked out the logistics in my mind during the rest of the song. At the end, when I always loop and build the final chorus, I got things going, killed my floor monitor (so as to avoid feedback), spun my mic to the crowd, and hit record. I wasn’t sure if it was going to work, but when I was finished and turned my monitor back up, it was there! Sweet.

So that’s about it. So much for being short.

Until next time…

Student X (1.24.06)...The Chessmaster

Okay, I felt the need to share this. (I promise it is accurate. I added the metaphor to help you understand the strategic war that we wage.)


I have been using my Gibson Les Paul to teach lessons and so I had it in my studio yesterday when student X arrived. After wrestling his guitar from its case he sat down and looked at me as if to ask “your move or mine.” It’s like a game of chess…I went first.

I asked him where his music book and CD were, the ones that I had asked him to bring last time. His move was to promptly change subjects.

“H-H-Hey,” he quickly interjected. “That’s a nice guitar.”

Just like that he had taken one of my pawns.

I tried to say thanks but was cut off.

“I’ll give you $500 dollars for it.”

“I don’t think so,” I responded kindly, knowing that not only was this way too little, it had nothing to do with our lesson. It was a swift move with my Knight.

He countered. “How about $1,000?”

I moved a Bishop to take one of his pawns.

“It’s not for sale.” I said, sure that I had ended the conversation. He wouldn’t give in so easily.

“I’ll give you 30 million dollars!”

I was stunned, caught off guard. He had taken my Bishop and now my Rook was cornered.

“You don’t have 30 million dollars,” was all I could come up with. It just delayed the inevitable. He took my Rook.

“I’ll borrow it,” he arrogantly replied.

I could feel myself being backed into a corner. So I reached for my Queen in an act of desperation.

“You can’t pay back 30 million dollars! You’ll be in debt the rest of your life!” The quiver in my voice betrayed the uncertainty of this move.

He didn’t even have to think. It was like he had been planning this all along. I had just walked into it. There was just one more move to set up.

“No I won’t,” he proposed.

“Why not?” I countered.

“Because I’ll kill the people that loan me the money,” he said with a smile, anticipating the climax of his scheme. He turned and pointed at my guitar.

“Then I’ll play that guitar at their funeral.”

Checkmate…

Traffic Hat Trick, Carrots, Opossums, and What Happens in Ohio...(tour 1.19-1.21)

Note: The views expressed in this Blog/Journal in no way reflect the ideas or character of Beau Bristow in such cases as they might tarnish the reputation thereof….and what happens in Ohio, stays in Ohio…





It was a sunny January morning. The birds were singing, the breeze was blowing, the air was crisp….and I was throwing 80 pound pedalboards into 70 pound station wagons (okay, there’s only one pedal board and only one station wagon…singular Beau, singular).

I do it every time. I wait until the last minute and then break my neck getting packed and out the door for a gig. I slept about 6 hours and got up Thursday at 5:30 to go to the gym. I knew that I would pay for it, but it is routine, even ritual, and so I found myself sweaty, smelly, just back from a good workout and running like crazy to get things ready to be at Michael Shoup’s by 10:00 AM. I tore down my gear from my practice room and loaded it in my car in 15 minutes…a new record…for my heart rate.

I pulled up at Shoup’s a full 15 minutes late. (Enter Vince, Paul and Michael)

If you know Vince Romanelli, percussionist and ladies-man extraordinaire, then you know enough. If you know Paul Shearer, then you know quality guiataristry. (Yes spell-check, I know guitaristry isn’t a word…back off…)

Now Paul and Vince were with us to back up Michael (www.michaelshoup.com). I haven’t done a tour with Paul ever, and it has been a long time since I have done anything with Michael and Vince. All I can say is…it was a blast.

We began by making plans to paint my car orange to make it look like a carrot…a topic that arose subsequent to our throwing baby carrots at each other in the Mapco parking lot…so much for a healthy snack for the road.

Now there is nothing so entertaining as driving behind Michael and Vince, watching their silhouettes play air drums and sing BGVs (background vocals, for the uninitiated) while going down the interstate (we took two cars, Michael led). I was so intrigued that I failed to react when I saw Michael’s brake lights come alive and dart to the side. The result: a head-on collision with five-eights of a blown big-rig tire. We pulled over to scope out the damage and had to tear off the rubber skid plate from beneath the front bumper of my car because it was broken loose on one side and dragging. To make matters worse, I kneeled to look under the car and suddenly realized that there was skin, bones, and a little bit of stench left of a flattened opossum less than 10 inches from my face…so much for a healthy snack for the road… After cramming the skid plate in the car just behind Paul’s head, we were off again….Traffic incident Number 1.

Now I haven’t seen a study, but my experience has led me to conclude that women are the more prevalent perpetrators of road rage and “automobile aggression” (another new term from Beau Bristow). Maybe it’s due to their tendency to overreact, a product of their increased levels of emotion and lower levels of reason. (See disclaimer at top, and send all hate mail to mailto:vince@vinceromanelli.com).

I had just entered Ohio when I found myself in the far left lane with a large line of faster traffic bearing down on me. Michael was already in the middle of the three lanes, so I gave my signal and after a few seconds began moving over. Now I was aware that there was a car coming up in the middle lane, but I gave my signal while it was at a distance and slowly began merging. Of course they never let up and as soon as I merged they swerved into the right lane, sped up beside me, and pointed at the front of their car, mouthing that I had almost hit it (and saying other things that I couldn’t make out). Now don’t get me wrong, the girl driving the car was cute, in a fascist sort of way, and I probably should have pulled over, built an altar and slaughtered a thousand goats for cutting her off, but that doesn’t excuse her blitzflickin automobile aggression. Apparently I didn’t give the response she desired for her antics, so she floored it and swerved at my car as she passed. Paul’s eyes were as big as crop circles, and she was closer to me than I had been to the dead opossum….Traffic incident number 2.

(By the way, we phoned Vince, since he and Michael were ahead of us, to have him blow the girl a kiss…they never caught up to her.)

We pulled into the Shoup residence in Beaver Creek, OH in time to eat diner and change my guitar strings (yeah, I know…procrastinator). It was great to stay with Michael’s parents again. They are great…the polar opposite to sleeping in the car.

The show at Wright State was a blast, but I was so tired from a busy week and a 5:30 morning that I was half asleep the whole time. Afterwards we hit a club close to campus.

Now this could easily be counted as traffic incident number 3, but I will save that designation for later. For those who know me, you know I’m not a club kind of guy. Yeah I’ll swing dance, or at least try, and I have made a fool of myself to some salsa at least once, but the typical club holds no interest for me. Nevertheless, I found myself dancing with….well…being danced upon, by a very kind soul who I‘m sure will never remember it because her blood-alcohol level was like 75 psi or something like that. I’m glad Vince, Michael, Paul, and Ryan all got a kick out of it, since they went to the trouble of instigating it…and I’m glad nobody got pictures…

Friday morning Vince had to fly to Arkansas for another gig (check out www.bucketboys.net). Michael, Paul, and I played a bar in Dayton that night called the Nite Owl. My guitar still smells like smoke, but the crowd was a lot of fun. It’s always interesting to see the things that happen musically from the stage in front of a bar crowd. You’ll try to play anything…once…and it’s amazing how many choruses to Sweet Home Alabama people will sing with you. It’s always fun for everyone, and nobody cares or remembers how bad it is…

Saturday morning I was up in time to get some work done. I co-wrote a song a few weeks ago with Jaclyn Brown (www.jaclynbrown.com) and have been working on a demo for it to get to a song-plugger. Saturday I did some mixing for the demo on my Powerbook. (Look for a #1 hit by the winter of 2006.)

After a nap we cleaned, packed, ate, and jetted out for Lexington. I hated to say goodbye to the Shoups and home cooking, but Common Grounds awaited. I have grown to really love this little venue just off of the UK campus. Great coffee, a stage, lights, and a crowd of friends. What more could you want? It was a fun show and I enjoyed hanging out with some of my crew afterwards.

By the time I left for Nashville it was 3:30 AM (Eastern). I hit the Bluegrass Parkway, which was barren at this time of night, and loosened the reigns on the “woman repeller” (Matt’s affectionate title for my tour bus...the 70 pound wagon with 7000 pounds of gear). Now the speed limit is only 65, but I felt that it was flexible since there wasn’t even a headlight in sight…at least not until the flashing ones that informed me that I was going 83 (a physical impossibility for a 70 pound wagon with 7000 pounds of gear…and no skid plate). Fortunately, the officer was merciful and gave me a “courtesy ticket.” Traffic incident number 3.

So I wrapped up my little traffic hat trick, and pulled into Nashville at 5:30 (Central). I was up by 7:30 to play for church….exhausted.

That’s it for last weekend. For this weekend it’s Nashville, Auburn, and Birmingham…...bring it!

Tour 1.6.06-1.7.06 (Vespa, Blitzflikin, and more)

Christmas, what? Now it’s ’06 and I can’t figure out where my blitzflikin (my new favorite expletive) holiday went….I mean one minute it’s holly and mistletoe and the next thing I know I’m running like crazy trying to figure out why all of my checks won’t clear…crap…’06 not ’05 dufus!....sorry about that, I‘ll write another one…
And really, why is a box of checks so expensive…shoot, you have to write a check and then go make a deposit just to buy more checks…there’s a philosophical conversation beneath that concept…I’ll spare us both of that…

Anyway, it was good to be back on the road again. Let me just say that the Chattanooga Starbucks happens to be across the hall from a high-class steak house…you should try the black angus blend…bold…(okay it was funny at 10:00 PM on 4 hours of sleep after getting up at 5:30 this morning, “lactic legs” day in the gym, co-writing a hit song, and then teaching guitar lessons non-stop for 5 hours…back off) (btw, I wish I could remember what Student X said today ‘cause man was it funny…)

I have always been leery of playing at a Starbucks, but my first Starbucks show was a winner. It was good to see a couple of the Grace Academy crew there and I even met one of my MySpace friends in person….bless you Tom…(inside MySpace joke…no, tom wasn’t at the show)

Oh yeah! I got new shoes Friday. This is monumental in two ways. First of all I have been wearing either my brother’s hand-me-downs or my 3 year old Chacos for the past few years (no my Chacos weren’t three years old a few years ago…quit being so blitzflikin critical)….anyway, having a new pair of shoes makes me want to run…at least for a minute…then I realize that there’s no point in doing something that Ethiopians are so much better at…oh, and the shoes…Addidas Sambas…no I don’t play soccer (at least not since the worst YMCA soccer team ever disbanded in 93) but I love the way they feel…

Which brings me to the second reason this is monumental…I have only played one show in shoes other than my sandals, and I accidentally hit the reverse button on my line 6…and…well…crash….so I was a little nervous about a show with new shoes but it was great….it was like I didn’t even have them on…which has inspired me to return them, get my $40 back, and go barefoot…(btw, you people really need to clean up after your blitzflikin dogs in the park).

Anyway, Sarah and I stayed with her parents Friday night (thanks! to the Peacock family). Honestly, weekend tours tend to be my getaway. I slept more Friday night than I have in a while. In fact, I got up for a bowl of cereal around 10 and then went back to bed…can’t you just hear the angels singing…

The show that evening ay Eddies Attic was awesome. The sound, lights, and atmosphere are all great. I hope to be back soon.

I guess I am the most proud of my time from Atlanta to Nashville…under 4 hours…amazing. We got delayed leaving due to a spontaneous Vespa ride. Now if you don’t know what a Vespa is, look it up online and then imagine Sarah and I riding one in January….ever seen dumb and dumber? Yeah.

So that’s about it for this update. Maybe next time I’ll have something worth saying…maybe…